Internet Dating + Two 20Somethings = Disastrous

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FYI: Bradenton is on the Gulf Coast south of Tampa. 

Seriously though, TWENTY FIVE MINUTES?! in that kind of heat? 

I messaged a guy on okc a few days ago. We just today started texting and it got pretty feisty. 

his profile questions mentioned something about not finding overweight people attractive (of which I am one) so when he was propositioning me this morning I made sure to be perfectly clear what type of beautiful lady he was dealing with. 

He brings up this whole fantasy of a glory hole and how he’s always wanted to do that. I told him that I was certainly not doing that. 

Before my text re his “pushing rope” I showed him a picture of my underwear clad body taken in my work bathroom (hawt!) and he responded with a dick pic, saying “fair is fair.” 

and then the rest happened. 

too bad, he looked cute. 

All men are garbage people.

Liz.

And no, she doesn’t mean their occupation. 

This is slightly terrifying.

Ok dude, stay calm, but i think your dog is actually the monster from Cloverfield.

I was talking to a hairy, older(ish) looking 22 year old on OKC for maybe a week and we decided to have dinner last night. 

Yes, 22. Eye roll city. But he seemed smart enough and like I said, looked older than me. 

We met at a Chinese place. I was immediately bored. He was showing his age with the most boring, stupid topics I can’t even remember! But he did say that I looked either “really bored or really tired.” 

He told me “ok you talk now” and ” you say things” a few times because he said he felt an awkward silence. TBQH, I didn’t feel awkward at all. I just wanted to eat my damn Kung Pow Chicken. If I also had things to talk about, great! Also, he was eating off my dang plate, WITHOUT asking. 

When the TWENTY TWO dollar check came he had already pulled out his card and I asked if he wanted to split it and before the words were out of my mouth he shout-answered YES. I was like, Jeez man, treat a bitch once in your life. wow.

Previously in our little chats he had mentioned that he and his last girlfriend had broken up because her “feminist views clashed with his heavy sarcasm.” His profile is also littered with “I’m so sarcastic” comments that people love to throw around. So, imagine my surprise when at the end of the dinner he tells me that if was really difficult to “sift through my extreme sarcasm.”

I told him I had no reason to actually be rude to him, *yet*, and it was all just jokes, kid. 

And then essentially he ended with ” I wish you the best of luck in all your endeavors.”

Big girls cry when their heart is breaking

http://38.media.tumblr.com/1151e34c3a0a9009864cc70b36731392/tumblr_n697iufhEs1ql5yr7o2_250.gif

Got on Plenty of Fish, was talking to this guy for a couple days and we went out on Saturday night.  I had a really great time.  He’s so sweet and a good kisser.  He’s going through a divorce so he’s not looking to get into anything serious and neither am I.  It’s just nice to have someone to enjoy being around and keep each other company.  I think we could be good for each other.  He’s going to help me get in shape.  I’ve also been talking with my girlfriend about getting me a really good job. 

I was all excited to wake up today with a positive and productive attitude but I just feel like shit.  My throat started hurting a little bit yesterday, and I hoped it would get better with some rest and vitamin c and zinc, but no luck.  I think all the anxiety, stress and lack of sleep/poor diet these past few weeks finally caught up with me.   My friend suggested I start smoking pot haha He said it helps him put things in perspective.

I’ve been talking to 007 pretty much every day since the incident, but I’m going to stop.  It’s too painful, and I don’t need him or his drama in my life.  I told him I had a date and he said, “that’s fine, I’m going to block your number.”  Then the next day he sent a text saying, “I’m guessing you spent the night with him.” Motherfucker, you realize you’re still living with the girl you cheated on me with right?! I can’t.  He owes me money, that’s the only reason I’m even still bothering to keep the lines of communication open.  I’m stupid, I know. 

same

The new me will have to begin next week (I like making life changes on Mondays.  I’m weird.  I might be persuaded to start tomorrow if I feel better).

I recently emptied my car and found this old journal. Attempting to update my “list of men.” There were names on here i had absolutely forgotten about

There were two ways you could have reacted to my (joke) response. You chose this awesome, angry sounding way.

1.)cheating boyfriend
2.)busiest work week at this job to date
3.)moving to a new apartment

Might as well start off with the truth haha also I didn’t notice his words were mixed up until just now.

bustysaintclair said: "Medicine" by Alex Winston

I like it! Thanks!

Please suggest awesome songs for a break up/packing playlist!

I’m officially single. And the story is so perfect for the blog (because it was a shit show that only I would get myself involved in), but I’m just too depressed/tired/blah to type it out right now.

Actually I’ve been perusing Tinder, mostly for entertainment purposes cuz I have no actual interest in meeting anyone from there. I want to get on POF, but I can’t be bothered to create a new profile.  And I know I need to just take some time, but ugh.  I’m pretty fucked up over this.  Liz was kind enough to send me a list of low cost therapists in my area so I think I’m gonna make an appointment soon. 

I’m moving to a new apartment this weekend so clean slate time!